Britain catches a cold (Crack story includes my version of Australia)
by Nightmaress1
Summary: You know how it is in Britain and England, it's cold and rainy, a great way to catch a cold. Poor old Iggy got one and it's up to France and America to cure him of this illness. So they call Australia to help since they don't really know what to do. Read and find out what happens! (Slight Australia X Britain, but it's more sibling love) I don't own the original APH series!


Well, Britain caught a cold yet again thanks to the poor weather his country receives.  
France and America teamed up to brainstorm about this predicament.  
They found a few ideas like; sun, a heater, warm soup, hot water bottle, an electric blanket or a sleeping bag, but the one that stood out most was women.  
Yep, the precious things to men would have to be women.  
The only problem was, the only girl that would be able to help is Australia, but she's Britain's "little sister" for some reason.  
Since it was America and France that was thinking of ways to help, they obviously didn't care if it was an old lady helping out.

America called Australia over, but didn't explain the situation.  
When she had finally arrived, America brought her to the poorly feeling country.  
"Oh no! Britain!" called Australia as she laid eyes on her "sibling".  
She rushed to his side and comforted him with a soft hug.  
"No... Don't...," mumbled Britain, "I don't want you to catch whatever I've got."  
He placed a hand in her cheek and gave Australia a weak smile.  
"This is too touching!" chimed France as creepy fantasies entered his perverted mind.  
"How can I help? I will do anything." asked Australia with worry in her tone.  
"If you put it that way, just put this on and follow our instructions." explained America as he pulled out a random clothing bag.  
"Ah... What's this?" asked Australia as she took the bag and walked over to the door.  
"Just put it on! It's finely made in my country!" said France as he pushed Australia down the hall and to a spare room.  
Him and America ran back to Britain's room and waited.

As Australia kept walking, she thought of what the French made.  
'Well the French are good with fashion, so I wouldn't really have a clue what this is.' she thought as she pretended to have X-ray vision.  
She found the room and began to change.

"Oh come on!" the France and America heard Australia yell from down the hall.  
France and America chuckled at Australia's reaction.  
"What's going on?" asked Britain as he stirred from his deep rest.  
"Don't worry bro! You'll feel better after Australia helps you." smiled America as he patted Britain on his shoulder.

Soon, Australia came into the room with a short nurse's uniform on and thigh-high socks.  
The top half of the dress type garment let Australia's breasts practically fall out of it.  
"Guys this isn't funny!" she pouted as she crossed her arms across her chest and blushed.  
She put her knees together so no one could see up this disgraceful uniform.  
"It suits you perfectly mon amie!" chimed France as he approached her.  
He put an arm around Australia and pulled her closer.  
"No thanks man," Australia sighed as she pushed the creepy man away, "you two called me all the way here for this? I gave up a good time to go surfing, you could just give him 2 Minute Noodles for breakfast lunch and dinner and he will be feeling happier than a koala asleep in a tree all day."  
"I thought you would do anything to help?" asked America with his puppy dog eyes.  
"Yes but this is a little bit too far." stated Australia as she fiddled with the bottom of the dress and pulled down the back.

"You have a perfect figure for this lingerie." complimented France.  
"But my undies are showing!" she pouted as her blush increased.  
"Follow our instructions and it will be all over soon." said America as he tried to calm down Australia.  
"Oh and 'undies' are actually called panties." added France.  
"Shut up! I call them what I want!" yelled Australia.  
"At least my country doesn't call flip-flops thongs." added France.  
Australia slapped France across the face as hard as she could, which was pretty damn hard for someone her age.  
France rubbed the red mark on his face and whimpered.  
"Come on, please Australia." asked America as his puppy dog eyes looked deep into Australia's.  
"Awwwww! So cute!" called Australia as she glomped America.  
"Woah dude, you're supposed to do that to Britain." sighed America.  
"What? This?" asked Australia as she looked up at his face.  
She slammed America into a wall, which stunned him, then slowly lowered him to the ground.  
She climbed onto America and pinned him to the ground.  
He couldn't help but blush as he looked at her breasts.  
"Is that how you want me to make him better?" asked Australia as her hair waterfalls down her shoulders.  
"Mom Cherie! That is perfect!" cheered France he looked at Australia's curved body and up the dress.  
She leaned down to America's face and rubbed cheek against his.  
"D-dude?" whimpered America.

Britain was slowly awakening from his deep slumber and saw the situation.  
He turned red with anger.  
"What the bloody hell is going on here?!" yelled Britain as he sprung out of bed, "Is this a dream or a nightmare?!"  
"Britain!" called Australia as she jumped up and cuddle Britain.  
"And what are you wearing?!" said Britain as he scanned over his 'little sister'.  
"It was all them!" yelled Australia as she buried her face in Britain's chest and pointed at France and America.  
"You two are dead!" called Britain.  
Australia gave France and America an evil glare as she poked her head out from the position.  
The two countries trembled with fear.  
They knew Australia was secretly evil, just like Russia, but Australia only shows it when she's on the war fields.  
Britain on the other hand, they knew that he would do anything in his countries power to do what he could to get revenge, so he would team up with Australia and they will be doomed.

"Look we're sorry," said France as him backed away to the doorway, "it won't happen again, we promise."  
"Oui! We'll leave you two alone!" whimpered France he and America got stuck in the doorframe.  
They struggled to get out of sight.  
Australia let go of Britain and approached the two fearful countries with the same evil glare.  
Britain watched her and scanned the dress she was wearing and blushed at how 'un-lady like' it was.  
Australia clenched her fist and gave an evil smirk, but America and France scampered away just in time.  
"They got lucky." chirped Australia as her normal and cheerful personality came back.  
Britain hugged Australia from behind.  
"Hey, what's wrong Iggy?" asked Australia as she looked up at her 'brother's' face.  
"I dint want anything bad to happen to you," Britain sighed as he buried his face into Australia's soft hair and tightened his grip around her waist, "you're the only person who will be by my side."  
"Britain, don't think like that, there are other nations out there that will come and help you out, France and America came over and tried to help you get better, see they care." explained Australia, reassuring that people would help him.  
"Your right," smiled Britain, "I shouldn't think about stuff like that."  
"Right! Now why are you hugging me like this?" Australia pointed out and blushed.  
"Oh sorry!" stuttered Britain as he let go.

"Well France and America were right, a woman does help a man get better from illness." smiled Australia as she put her hands on her hips.  
"In a way, yes they were right." smiled Britain as he wiped his nose on his sleeve.  
"Now, the great Aussie to cure a cold is to have good old 2 Minute Noodles." smiled Australia as she sorted through her bag and pulled out a packet of the noodles.  
"Oh ok then, thanks love." smiled Britain as he sat on the bed.  
"I'll go make them now!" called Australia as she ran down the hall.  
"Australia!" called Britain as he caught Australia's attention.  
"Yeah?" asked Australia as she walked backwards to the doorframe.  
"Aren't you going to change your clothes?" he asked.  
"No, I think it suits me now," smiled Australia as she spun around, "besides, I am your nurse right now aren't I?"  
Britain blushed as Australia ran off again with a happy, yet insane sounding, laugh.  
"She just doesn't know how much she means to me." mumbled Britain as he settled down into his bed and waited for his special meal.

After 5 minutes, Australia came into Britain's room with a tray with his food.  
It had a soup cup of chicken 2 Minute Noodles, a cup of lemonade and an icy-pole.  
"Is this what you do when you're sick?" asked Britain.  
"Yep, but usually I have to get up and do it myself since no one comes when I'm sick." explained Australia as she placed the tray on Britain's lap.  
"I'll come by when you're sick and comfort you." smiled Britain as Australia handed him a fork.  
"Really? Thanks!" smiled Australia as she sat on the floor.


End file.
